in

mybodyneedschangeandineedcash:

connoririshwright:

soloontherocks:

theskypilot:

jayskalo:

loose-skinnyjeans:

strawberriesandabs:

jumpingjacktrash:

thischick25:

This is the main reason for my general annoyance with lack of size regulation in the fashion industry…

men’s pants are labeled by waist and inseam measurement. women’s pants are labeled by voodoo. even though i do not buy women’s pants, i can recognize this as objectively dumb.

THE NOTES ON THIS

image

because i can’t stress this enough. this is why i don’t let the numbers get to me. as jumpingjacktrash so eloquently said “women’s pants are labeled by voodoo.” 

BUT THISTHISTHISTHISTHIS

so when boys make fun of girls taking forever to shop and trying everything on

WE FUCKING HAVE TO OR NOTHING WILL FIT

HOW THE FUCK COULD WE POSSIBLY SHOP WITHOUT TRYING EVERYTHING ON, NUMBERS DO NOT OPERATE NORMALLY IN THE WOMENS SECTION OF THE STORE

This is blows my mind and is so strange to me.

Like, men’s pants are sized by inches. Inches do not change at each store. An inch is an inch no matter where you go. However, women’s pants aren’t sized that way so they’re NEVER the same. I *usually* wear a size 20. However, I have some size 20 jeans I can barley pull up over my knees and some that are ‘the same size’ that fall to my ankles if I don’t hold them up all day! AND THEY’RE FROM THE SAME FREAKING STORE. 

in

Before you fuck up and call her anything less than her name, before you grab her by the arm you need to know the trigger that you are pulling at. You need to know that the safety is never on. You need to know her history before you tell me that this isn’t my business. You need to know that her history is my history.

See, she and I, we come from the tribe of raw knuckled little girls who call our father by their first names and wear their mothers like bruise coloured war paint under eye. We grew thick skin before we grew permanent teeth. We learned to piece together our own families in the backyards of rented duplexes where we promised plastic faced babies better things in soothing tones that we mimicked from TV. We do not have daddy issues even though our daddy’s have issues. We have piercing eyes and promises to keep. We grew up to be nomads surveying domestic war zones with black eyeliner binoculars, always refusing to camouflage. We threw our heads back and laughed at oncoming explosions, never flinched, absorbing shrapnel, never let them see us cry.

We do not dream of boys who will save us from towers. We dream of boys with courage caked under their fingernails. Boys with hands rough enough to wipe metal tears from our faces but warm enough to mold them into stars. Boys with vertebrae strong enough to lock with ours so they can sleep sitting back to back with us and keep watch. And these are the boys, these are the boys who will find love under our armor. These are the boys who will find that we love selectively but we love fiercely. These are the boys who will learn that we love in ways that leave claw marks down the baseboard before we ever let go.

So do not think she doesn’t know how you fear her absence - you should. Your cage is not stronger than her will or her smile. Do not think you are good enough to tame her. You aren’t. And do not think you are the first to try because i have already closed your eyes and crossed your arms before your body hit the floor. And you think she deserves better than you. You are right. So be better than you.

Be thankful that she knows your name and be careful never to forget hers.

Rachel Wiley  (via false-evections)

I'm First

in

Certainly there are issues I advocate for. There are political events I follow and comment on. There are problems the world faces on a daily basis that I’d like to alleviate if not eradicate entirely. Yet, my main priority in life has often been solving my own problems. Those I face on a continual basis, and those that occur within my family. I don’t see how I can focus on the larger issues if my personal life is hanging by a thread. I can’t focus on fighting world hunger if there are demons trying to bring me down every step of the way.

There is one thing I’ve been searching for and that’s inner peace. And while I’ll do my very best to fight the issues I feel strongly about, I don’t think I’ll be able to put in 150% until I’ve faced my own problems and accepted my own flaws. It would be a disservice to do otherwise.

Love

in

My writing is usually based on strong negative emotions. I hardly ever write about the happy times, mainly because I rather be engulfed by them, instead of dissect them. If I’m happy I want that feeling to fill me up inside, I want to remember it, I want cherish it. With that said, I’d like to point out how incredibly blessed I feel. Despite all the negativity surrounding me, God has blessed me with someone who soothes all my pains, whether physical or emotional. Someone who makes me happy in a way words really can’t capture. I’m not sure how long this person is meant to be in my life. But whether its a few months or a lifetime, I want to make sure I enjoy every moment of it.

Life is good.

The Chase

in

During the chase he’s willing to give you the world because you’re the challenge hes been waiting for. There’s no price too large, no deed too dangerous. But when you say yes its like signing a contract. It’s an irrevocable decision. He believes his efforts while courting were extravagant enough to compensate for his current apathy. He slowly weans you off, so skillfully you don’t notice what he’s doing. You don’t notice you’re in a relationship by yourself, being held back and holding on to the hope of things getting better.

Everything Has A Price

in

It seems like every relationship consists of an exchange between goods. My peace of mind has a price, the restrictions I impose because I have to, to reserve my self worth, also have a price. It’s all leverage, and you won’t sacrifice unless you know it will be worth something later on. Nothing is genuine, its simply a matter of give and take, but with our selfish interests in mind. This is why you can’t trust what this is so soon. You can’t make a judgement until you reach a brick wall and have to figure out how to get over it together. That’s when you know where you both stand in each other’s lives. So despite how beautiful forever sounds, despite how well the pieces seem to fit now, its absolutely necessary to take a step back, and hold back until the fog subsides.

AOL Away Message

in

So this is an AOL away message that I copied and emailed to myself so I wouldn’t forget it. I didn’t know it back then, but now I definitely recognize where this is from. Do you?

Hard to breathe, feels like floating
So full of love my heart’s exploding
Mouth is dry, hands are shaking
My heart is yours for the taking
Acting weird, not myself
Dancing around like the Keebler elf
Finally time for this poor schlub
To know how it feels to fall in lub

–> Thanks Ryan lol

HS Poem2

in

Clearly I was a little dark in HS, but I think it’s important to share this part of me. It reminds me of who I was back then, and how that affected who I am now.

I saw you and immediately i cared
No questions no judgements i just knew
In my heart you were there
I loved your voice and the way you spoke to me
I was so stupid to fall for your words, now im in misery
we were friends for a while we talked ,we laughed
but now you ignore me
I feel like an old photogragh
taken, used for a while and thrown away never to be seen again
Why’d you do it? can we at least be friends?
No, we cant be friends you hurt me too much
This relationship whether love or friendship has come to it’s tragic end
But wait let me ask why would you deny it?, when i asked why?
Did you think i was that stupid
Or did you want to see me cry
You know what just forget it
I will never know
 _______ ________
This very minute I bury you 6ft below!

HS Poem

in
The touch
I think about him all the time
I wonder if he likes me
No doubt he’s always on my mind
His smile brights up the darkest of places
Even the most frowning unhappy faces
My heart beats 4 him
My eyes seek him
My whole body is yearnin 4 him
Theres nothing i can do
The sight of him brings a chill down my spine
Maybe its an urge i don’t know
Im confused am i in love?
I feel his eyes on my face
My heart is beating faster every minute
He’s getting closer now he’s looking straight into my eyes
He looks down at my lips
He’s getting closer i feel him breathin on me
I stay still. Im a statue
Then his hands touch my waist
Hes nervous too
But he doesnt stop
hesitantly i put my arms around him
I see him smile
 the he tilts his head and our lips touch
And move in a smooth tense way
 His kiss felt like it could last forever
the HE……..

Can't Wait

in

I can’t wait to forget his embrace. That first time he wrapped his arms around me and I was certain something about us had changed. I can’t wait to forget the look in his eyes when he said something clever and stole my composure. I can’t wait to forget how he observed me, analyzing every bit of me to see if I measured up. I can’t wait to forget the opportunities he laid out for me. I can’t wait to forget how heavy my heart felt when it realized it wasn’t chosen. I can’t wait to forget, how I tried to forget, but couldn’t because forgetting meant admitting I wasn’t good enough.

I can’t wait to forget how I tried and failed.

They Linger

in

Love lingers, and everyone that has ever shown me love, whether it was romantic or other, stays with me. I may not speak to them anymore, they may not want to see me again, they may have moved on to bigger things, it doesn’t matter. Their spirit stays with me.

Some may misinterpret that as my desire to still be with them if it was a romantic love. But that’s not it at all. I just commit to love. So when it happens I cherish it, and it becomes a part of me.

So thank you to all my loves. It may not be the case now, but I know it was real.

Big Picture

in

I’m constantly stuck between fighting for my small goals and looking at the big picture. I’ve mentioned several times before that I want to get an apartment of my own. Just to have a space that is all mine. A space where I call the shots.

Yet, lately I’ve thinking I should hold it out and save up for a house. Sure I’ll be sharing it with a husband and children, but I bet it’d feel great to have a place of my own that’s long term. A place I know my grandchildren will come to visit me in. A place I’ll decorate and renovate alongside my husband…

Ahh I don’t know which is better. The 21 year old me tells me to live in the now and work as many jobs as possible to get my apartment. Yet the future mommy in me craves the white picket fence, and the front lawn and a garden….and a dog house….

I can’t have both, so I’ll choose the one that means the most to me.

Future mommy wins.

Teach Me How to Throw A Football

in

At work today, a young foreigner probably close to my age, asked me if I was American. Considering we’re in America I usually don’t get that question, “where is the bathroom” on the other hand is a popular one. I asked him to repeat himself, just to make sure I was hearing correctly, and then I answered yes, not sure where this was going. His next question though, blew my mind.

He asked me if I could teach him how to throw a football…

Now for some background, I work in a university bookstore that happens to sell footballs.

I giggled a bit and said, “well I don’t know how to throw a football…” The confusion in his face was fascinating. His friend then went on to explain he had a roommate that played American football so he kinda knows how to throw it.

I thought this was interesting because it seems like the idea of gender specific sports are very prominent here in the US. If someone mentions a basketball game, we’re more likely to think of a man. If someone mentions tennis however, or maybe volleyball, we’re likely to think of a woman.

So to have this young man assume I can play football because it’s part of American culture, and not think twice about my gender, made me feel like there has been some sort of breakthrough in the fight for gender equality.

It may seem like a bit much but we are still fighting for gender equality, and any accomplishment, regardless of its size should be praised.